Siri D's Blog

changed.

Siri D — Wed, 23 May 2012 21:21:50 +0000

… have you ever felt yourself evolving…changing……. spontaneously…without internal pressure to do so? not a physical… or ..even psychological change… a spiritual change… that happens in the atom…. at the deepest cellular level…

and just like that…one day… the things that used to move us…influence us…and or maybe inspire us…. poof!!! just like that…. they are neutralized

not saying its good… not saying its bad… just saying its a change at a deep cellular level… and we are somehow transformed… now… the catalyst can come from so many different sources…

it can come from, pain of unimaginable loss, joy, that transforms our lives….it can come from the deepest desire to evolve and change…and hard work and toil will then be rewarded…. it can come from so many things.

love… transforms us, makes us want to be better people … humans…. sharers of the earth….
hate…. can destroy us, when we seek to destroy things .. ideas … and seek to dis harmonize the balance of nature…..

lust in the same way can destroy us… for lust for anything… anyone….creates selfish desire…which leads to greed…arrogance…. and ultimately once that lust is fulfilled…. the platinum we saw…quickly unveils itself to be no more than pewter…. cracked chipped and ready for the waste bin…

and the trail of waste will be left for miles behind it.

when we fight the natural forces…. nature…will always be the victor… and to the victor… the spoils..

but who is to say the forces are not so superior in their choices???? the universe seeks to perfect…and bring balance to all things in its nature

human nature … seeks to control, challenge… and even oppose what we are so often gifted with.

so like Michael says… why bite? tell em that its human nature …why why…does he do me that way???”

sometimes… we bite ourselves…. sometimes…we get bit.

with all this being said… when it comes to visiting or re visiting the past.. it cant and will not be seen as it was in the past… the rules have changed..

the scent, the sensation, all covered or uncovered…. so why go to the past… we can never relive it and why would we want to … the present is the platform to set up the future..

we build a strong… positive … foundation for the future… when we are meticulous and prudent in our actions, … persevere… and keep a conscious mind towards our impact on our greater environment…. we build a solid lasting future that will impact us in a positive manner for generations to come.

a legacy that can be passed on …enjoyed…. cherished as lore…

if we build our present… with careless passion… frivolous … time wasting activities that have no good intention… frontology … ignorance… ungratefulness… fear… neediness…. lies…. than this my friend…. this is a house built out of cards…. and these cards will fold and fall sooner…usually rather than later….

and this will be another kind of lore…. a lore of lessons, and written to the tune…and the moral of this story is…

a how not to… if u will… and many will learn from the disaster… and say to themselves… i could never act like that… i could never be that way…. and worst of all … i dont ever want to end up like that…woah!!!”

the quite desperation turned to an aggressive plea for consideration…. the consideration… mocked… and then… aggressively turned to physical oppression… then more than that … physical attacks… soon enough an army was activated…all in the name of …. nothing…. the desperation receded… for it realized that it was not worthy… the consideration all but evaporated…. the love that was hated..was turned to hate…burned into hate… incinerated into the darkest essence of humanity.

if we seek the light… or enlightenment…. we cannot dance with the devil…laugh with the devil, in a manner of fronting…we must acknowledge we have chosen a side.. and in this time of spiritual warfare…sides must, and will be…. chosen .

why oh why is the devil so deliciously enticing? he says all the right things…. when he discourages us… he becomes our biggest fan…cheerleader…. when he kicks us … he is the first to offer an icepack for the bruises….offering our deepest desires… with sugary bait … made just to our taste..

just so…. it can feed once more on our purest … truest essence… and its ego can then be once again …renewed.

this applies to all things in human and divine nature.

can things change? transform? yes… didn’t we speak of this in the beginning? on that true deep cellular level….

but the evidence of this change comes in the form of true change…

in habit, activity, diet, consumption… people notice…and will say…. ” wow… you’re somehow different” if that is…

one is still associating with the associates that once ruled the roost…. possessed the key’s….. to the dark kingdom ….

or we go the other way…..we cast off all the familiar things .. all the things that remind us of who we were and who we are fundamentally not….. this is change…. a manner….where all past avenues…ways… ideas…..actions…communications…means of communications… are no longer appealing to us…

the flavor is not the same…. the giggles…. the charm … the attraction… to it all… is now repugnant….

this is true change… and then the repulsion turns to indifference…. and tho… the devil may keep reaching up to us….yes we notice….but after a while….

just like Buddha underneath the Bodhi tree…. the maya … the illusion…. will disappear…. and we are once again …sitting in the seat………………. of Nirvana.

where time…social trend… expectancy…. judgement… entanglement….none of it matters…. we have shed that skin… everything is in waiting to be born again…

we are open to our rebirth… and take that new step up that ladder of evolution…. we dont look back…. we dont look down…. no smile…no frown…

acceptance….excitement….. for what the forces are cooking up to offer us… once again… and again and again….

Mr. Forces whispered in her ear as she stood in the evening sun open heart…mind…. and filled with wonderment of the eclipsing sun….he brushed her hair gently back …he whispered …. “you’ve been patient…. graceful….everything is unfolding…. flowering…. everything is as it should be..

its time” Mr. Forces was taken by the wind ….as she looked for the winged messenger….

a feeling of liquid sunshine filled her body… and a smile emerged with radiant jubilation..no recollection of the pain of the past… ..
or even a desire to dodge a feeling ….

what could not be resolved had its own resolution… Mr. Forces….let her know…by his presence…. that the past

is forever gone… and the best of life;s offering … is all now ahead … and the focus on beauty… has manifested….as the beautiful life ))

Part II ooo now… that was weirdly awesome.

Siri D — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 10:19:25 +0000

… the sardine sandwiches would not do at all… no … not at all.

but where can i hide this food… this nasty nasty food…everyone knew that the fishes were cleaners of the ocean and not meant to be consumed… they had to be put in the purse… and now into the depth of the closet…. this will of course do away with this issue..she thought.

unknown to her senses… the closet flipped her back two years in age… it was a vortex, though not understood… she knew the other vortex had been in her mothers kitchen behind the refrigeration… but… the third eye must be used for transport. in any case… she was back .. on the floor of the vw volkswagen van there was a bed … the warm sun woke her from a vivid nightmare… mom.. oh mom…. i am so glad to see you today… how beautiful you are….so young …so free ……… now many years in the future …big machines… big big machines… taking over …the war … the battle….pulling herself out of this portal she landed back… in the closet….

no not the metaphor we look for in the modern story…siriusly…. she landed in the closet… now i think i would like to jump again..but not without tappy…. tappy must come too

he is so unhappy sitting by the pool.. in a daze…. he has tried to take his life with an overdose of ex-lax…….. and all it did was give him a terrible terrible stomacher ache… cuz…he didn’t eat enough…. he cant… he is sad and bewildered…. and there is nothing wrong with where he is right now… she loves him…. and must journey with him…. he is her brother… whether chosen or not….. if she could just get him in the portal…he too could see… that everything existed every where all the time…and he didnt have to be sad, he just had to travel there if his memories were not strong enough.

it would take several years for the portal to open up again… many days… spent laughing… crying … learning…earning …. yearning… believing.. un-believing … giving …receiving…. having awe, having fear, questioning, questing, hiding, and arresting….. ridin… flyin… givin … buyin…. looking …seeing…. seeking…. speaking….awesome life she thought…what a trip.

an this trip just keeps on being a trip.

back in the closet ….yes…back there now that she had gone forward …for a moment… she was back. the dress she wore was so old fashioned …. so fancy…. she looked like a little doll… not at all comfortable in this gear … for even tho ..here she is seven…. she is also twenty five…. and distinctly aware of it…

tappy… do yo want to come to the closet with me? we can go there and come back if it makes you feel safe…or…we can stay there… i think you will like the future better..and it might be good to skip a few years she thought to herself. ‘

we jumped into our 60′s… not bad she thought…but the planet had changed…drastically… this was all she could describe in the moment… drastic.. just imagine what ever that mean to you she projected that ..in to the reader… so they could get that visual… what ever drastic is to you…she repeated herself.

she acquired a day pass..to ride north to the animal sanctuary… she had heard of the wild things they were doing out there… and in the field she is in in this period.. the government will issue her a day pass to ride hwy 101 north… in this time… all pathways are licensed and everything moves by schedule… it is fun and it can be a real drag… no such thing as being in a hurry here..or bored…for that matter…

well in any case…here we are…

not bad… but i so long to be young again… no more purpose… driven by passion…. yeah…she thought… being 7 was a bit of drag…but finding that closet … changed her whole universe.
and so… the great sacrifice was well worth it….. she could visit any time any place… as long as she found her way…back to that closet.

its a hot summer in the San Fernando Valley… and she is 18… she likes it… she lives alone… her own place… done some things to her surprise… cuz it looked like from her side… it was someone else.

but that residual pain she thought that … that has to go…. but let me see how i dealt with this at 30… she thought..she must have straightened up emotionally by this time…i mean 30 and stuck on shit… that would not be living a life…what hell it would be to commiserate over things that we have no control over,, and the truth is she thought ..when we let go and ride the awesome ride, man its always better… on that other side.

horses, pop revelations, mansions, and habits, distractions, obligations, oh yeah this is fun…. she liked the way the sun felt on her skin, not too hot, not too cool….the breeze balmy…… deaths … transformations… voyages…. journeys…. more and more…faster and faster..everyday… discoveries…

how did we get from there… to here.. or here to there…depending on where we stood on the egg shape.

at some point in the history of humanity… there was a great disconnect, now…whether it was unintentional or evoked from a higher source.. at this point could not be discerned .. so .. disappointments… and triumphs.. devastation… acceptance… hibernating… metamorphic….

my oh my… the closet was long forgotten… the story of the world could not be silenced… it spoke and spoke on so many levels… so many voices, vibrations, life forms, they were all speaking… and she could here everyone… and it all wanted the same thing…

and so did she.

pumping music, water bottles…. sweat, surely this was the world too… and i would like to swim in this ocean for a while… i feel good here.

well… who wouldn’t…. she had turned into such a confident little creature .. maybe the word would be she became confidant… that every thing would always be okay..always alive… on so many levels, so the fear just kinda slipped away.. some would say vacant… but the whole of the positive creative force of the universe would swiftly takes its place.

i guess in those years… doubt was a necessary tool, for it made her question herself….and decide…and move from there…but after awhile the doubt became acceptance of what was to reveal itself, and this was a much more nature posture…. she liked it… and it made sense … here her body could relax.

the reader cried!! i cant keep up!! your here ur there… is it a lifetime? is it a moment?? well… yes…. she replied.

it was always customary to deliver a welcome speech to the new dawn.. the new day… saluuuuuute!!! good day sun! good day world…. buzzing by, whirling, spinning, a lot of the old world had left by now… the warming of the sun was captured in great solar panels and used for the grids all across the planet… a sort of recycling function… it was free subsidized by a gift from the earth human inhabitants… and rights rights were for all… and not for naught.

chillin, maxining…. relaxing…. a tropical drink in my hand… sunglasses, chipped pedicure…. topless… wait… i really like this….

but… she could not let herself get distracted from the reason she traveled… there were plenty of times that were not so comfortable…and as far as she could tell.. the more she projected into the future… the gap of reality widened… so different… and still … she had to find out how. .. what was the catalyst… the inception…. that we went from this collective humanity… to this … collective humanity… they were the same humanity… but so so different.

SD

landed … stranded…braved…. saved…. part I

Siri D — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 00:20:22 +0000

it must have been particularly beautiful day for some, there was so much going on in that day… but for these two bewildered children .. it was a day they would never, could never…forget…. there she lay… lifeless… stiff… cold….but somehow, seeing her still felt better than not seeing her there… because…at least… she was there…

soon enough… she was not there and neither were the children, whisked away, in the back of some type of official car .. with a police officer and a nurse, still nothing comforting… as the car traveled north, the little girl peered at the cartoons on the freeway over pass… this always made her smile, because before this day, it meant a day of adventure and fun… but not today… today, was strangers, and absence, confusion…. sorrow, hopelessness, even though she was only seven, she thought to herself, no words … today, there shall be … no words… or tears, or rebellion, it will be a surrender to the void, the vast open nothingness without form….waiting to be reformed, so that life..could once more take place.

the children were at the police station, being weighed, and measured, probed, and not much else, no juice, or fruit, not even a cookie.. just the coldness of the reality…. no more mommy…. today was the last day they would ever see their mommy.

now, i am sure that this is not the first time children have been orphaned, nor the last, but… no matter the species, whether it dies naturally, or brutally, the mother being taken from the young child is a life changing experience no matter the species, the gender, the religion… the mother is where we came from… and she is the nurturer, the protector, the confidant, the teacher, she is all things… well any way…

the young girl and boy were whisked away to a home of sorts, where they could at least get some rest, maybe eat some food, and just try to digest all that happened, is happening, and more than likely…about to happen….

they sat at the dinner table, not much conversation, for what conversation will a seven and ten year old have with complete strangers? none… How was your day? no, that question is inappropriate and rude…. so the awkward moments passed by as the children swallowed hard a meal of confusion and pain… now… off to bed…

The childrens clothes were all discarded so what they had on their backs was all that they possessed…. but somehow there was a wardrobe, must have been from past children that had traveled through here, with the same pain the little girl thought to herself, a little sunday for her, but, she was numb, and it really did not matter… she liked the purse because the purse is where she would keep her secrets, but soon enough… her secrets were discovered and she was punished…

a funny thing this punishment she thought, mommy never did this…what is this? she did not understand the point, it would not change her ideas about anything… and now… the lines were drawn… never before had she had to draw lines, but now at seven … she had to be grown… and set limits to what she would and would not let happen to her even if she had to take a stand against the large strangers….

religion, politics, laws, ideas, prejudice, its all…nonsense…yes… i said… nonsense.

Siri D — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 09:13:31 +0000

A man decided there is a corner for me, look he says … there is your place…. i gaze upon the grand scale of his imagination of which he has built an empire around himself…. yawn…. for tomorrow… it will be gone… or you or me…either way … everything material is transient…. so why let you…tell me….. who i am … what i am …. and where i can go…do or be?

the only reasonable posture to have in this world right now is doubt…. because you dont know… and i dont know…. and among all the pontification of this person of interest..or that person…. all of it is the same… an opinion … of a HUMAN BEING .. Having a human experience which they have created by their own thoughts… ideas …. and actions.

all paths are different…and as i have stated many times before… many rivers lead to the same sea… in fact…. when we all release our final breath…. we all merge in to the same sea …. and even this….. i cannot guarantee…. for what applies to you also applies to me.

and lately…. in this glorious age of instant information we are inundated with so many opinions of what is superior… where we are headed…. what is right and what is wrong…. what they leave out is mostly………………. the truth.

because…. well…. there is no profit in truth…. it is for the noble… the just….and the wise….. and this also does not have a high premium in todays society. …. well at least in the west… and i suspect …. greed… has spread globally.

and we…are all the victims of this…. greed….. oh…and yes… it did not just start up yesterday… or four years ago…. its been around since the dawn of time… only waiting to be the figure head of modern society.

and so, i dont think Shakespeare would be very popular today… not in this current society… to tell the woman he loved that he loved her publicly… privately…. whole heartedly….. truthfully…. poetically…. no….. his boys would be like …. “man…. dont be a pussy… you got a play that bitch…. keep anotha two or three around ….. just to let her know…she aint all that”

and so this man would betray his life, his heart, his destiny, to keep face with … his boys” or “society” ….

and even a book… which by the way i did not read…… “the rules” is a game to coach women into how to trick that man into doing everything she wants from him…. does he do it? did it work? i really dont know…. i dont like playing games…. i just feel what i feel when i feel it….. this is all…..

so in the end… the man who betrays himself…. ends up with someone who tricked him, the one he loves…. chooses a career to love…. and maybe never settles down… maybe she does….. the betrayer takes meds to get him through life… and the one he ended up with…well she ends up on intervention…. as some type of “holic” hehehe….. i know … i know it sounds jaded..

but, i tell u what , you submit another story one with truth…. depth, loyalty….. love, kindness….. passion…. and i will read Cinderella to you … hehehe ….

we as a species are still evolving…and as we evolve…we need to shed preconceived notions of who we are and what we are to be and how we express our most primal desires…. it does not always have to end in marriage…. cuz look at that mess… or….. co habitation…masquerading as fidelity…when in fact it is not…… why cant we just be what we are meant to be…

and if we find that groove we wanna stay in…. than stay in that groove…. but mostly…. i find relationships boil down to sex, finances, and fear of lonliness…..

companionship… is another thing all together… for too many times i have seen couples who cant stand eachother… yet live together…… and put on airs for the public…. and their true companions do not live or co habitate any where near them…

so…. he says…. will we be smooching…. and i say…. if you have to ask…. then the most likely answer would be…. no.

i want to know… what is it that drives a person to chase the very thing they drove away? it truly is perplexing and illogical to say the least…. unattractive to say the truest thing that come to mind

have at least the courage to stick to your original impulse….the one …we acted on….. see it through…. see where it carries us… to another life… another day… another world… who knows….but i for one… like to trip the unknown…

and so i like to always say… the past is gone…well because it is.

good memories will stay with us… and bad ones too…. but….. they are memories… and the dead must not be raised for it is done.

the laws, of a hundred years ago… are not the same laws of today… yet…. we see law as firm… not transient… but trust me… what is current in today’s society… might be a scourge of the future society…

this is why the constitution should be amended also… it was written two hundred years ago… this is a different world…and there is no way our founding fathers could have covered the future in this document we hold so dear…. it needs constant amendment … just like the law…. every year… laws change…. things change…. why does the constitution stay the same’… when we as a society have evolved…. and those who wish to seek more control…lean on the tenets that hold evolution back…

and so…. as i go into my corner…. i giggle…. oh but…. to myself… i dont wish to offend… or for the time being rabble rouse…. as i am known to do…from time to time… hehehe

for in this corner…. i can go in… and expand past this very planet….. and be free…. free to cultivate…. create…. evolve… and come into a deeper understanding of who i am … in this world…and beyond…. for yes oh yes… there is a beyond… a way way beyond…. and it is free…..

of judgement…. and class…. even gender….. age….. all the things we preoccupy ourselves with daily…. why????

when we are one under the atma…. all connected…. whether we like it or not….just because we dislike something or someone does not mean it is not part of us or our experience…. as i watch the series “heavy” i understand this more clear…. as they hold parts of themselves which they dont like or want to identify with .. up to the camera….. it is still them….. and they have to come to terms with what they created … before they can change it… but the change must come from within…. a desire… a faith… and works … must follow…. for change to occur…. they cannot just wish their extra weight away…. they must commit to a fundamental change…. and with the idea … the action will come…. the result will happen

same thing in this world… we cannot wish away corrupt politics… or laws, or discrimination, or hate, or cruelty…. we must make up inside of ourselves we will not be a part of this … then we must put these ideas with faith…into works… this is the way the world will change….

if i say…. i am an environmentalist…. and i eat at mcdonalds…. does this make me a hypocrite??? …. yes….

for faith and change require sacrifice…. if i say i am a vegan and wear leather or fur… am i a hypocrite??? yes…

if i say i am a peaceful person, and am always dishing out drama and disharmony to everyone around me…

if i lie…. if i cheat…. if i betray??? should i be a roll model for up and coming generations….even though i look good on paper???

if i make billions of dollars…. and present myself as a yogini…. is this hypocritical? NO. learn the difference.

if my talk matches my walk….. then all is well

if my talk…does not match my walk… i am a phantom… not even worthy of your time to read this blog.

i once knew someone, who asked me to come to his home for a visit…. tho… his invitation was covert and covered and clever i knew who it was and agreed to make the journey…. with delight…and joy…

upon arriving at his home, he asked my why i had come…… and i answered …. because you asked me……
he outright denied that he had done so, and in this denied that our minds and hearts were connected in the truest of ways…

not for one moment did i become confused whether or not he invited me, for infact he did….. but i did become confused as to who he was as a human being…. and why i would respond to someone who so easily would lie and manipulate without a thought… he lied as if it was just a normal thing… like breathing…

soon enough… i grew to understand…. that this was a damaged being…. and i became compassionate for it…. but in no way… would i entangle with something so out of balance… and self sabotaging…

its like a beautiful car that has a broken engine… why would i buy it??? i would not.

he has spent years trying to “talk and explain” his way in intellectual terms….. when he does not grasp that what we were was beyond intellect and this connection was interrupted and snapped by a problem in the wiring….

and for years…. he spins…. and for years… i watch…. detached…. unaffected…. but forced to watch…. because it is an invasive energy.

if we cannot communicate in truth… we cannot communicate…..

period.

this is the evolution of man…. that we come to our truth… and move from there… the truth is not always easy… in fact… it will challenge everything we “believe” we are and to be true…that we have made up to be our selves and function in this ever changing world…

but the truth… will always be the truth…from moment to moment…. and i try to stay authentic and in tune with it… and it takes daily checking…and rechecking of myself…. trust me…. but i am peaceful and more potent as a material being here for it.

regret, apologies, remorse, all lend to being stuck in the past… and the past is gone… so we must move on and be whole in our lives … each and every moment that we take a breath we must be present for it…

lamenting is dead…. and will never bring back …. instead…. learn…. grow… and move into the future… and know ur best times are in front of you…. that the best of your life is still to come…. and be happy and joyful for this…

stop worrying about what someone else is doing…or being….. it is their life…. the best is to live and let live….

we must all evolve together…. and respect…. everything and everyone… in this world….

i cannot go back to the past…. i do not even wish to…. if i had a time machine… i would travel to the future… not the past…

we all have made mistakes… and we all have had victories…. this is life….

when it comes to relationships… it takes two…. two to agree on what they decided they will be … or not be…

i tell you now, if i wanted to merge ….. i would be honest and open about it…. and it is not something i can be convinced of … it is an organic process… and for me… the less intellect involved…. always the better…. for there is no feeling in logic…

and if i was to reduce my feelings to logic… than it would be a hell no dot com heheheheh….. because it does not add up

but love, life, nature…. does not always add up…. because it is the magical part of life… the je ne sais quoi….. it is the magical part that human mind cannot touch it is the stuff of legends…. of mythological creatures…gods and goddesses….

remember to leave room in your beautiful life for magic… when it happens in your life…. be present…. appreciative…. and let it flow…however it wishes to flow…. trust yourself…. and trust the magic…

for it does not happen that much in life…. become still…. and patient for it…instead of trying to create it … or re-create… it … this never works….

it might have moved on to another dimension…or world…. if we were not ready and or took it for granted…

in any case….expect the magic…and know… that it might not come in the package you put together in your head… trust the universe will give you always what you want…and mostly what you need…for you to evolve…and get to the next level…

i love you all

enjoy……………………………… your magical life

xoxo

Siri Dyal

I love U.

Siri D — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 09:07:55 +0000

I luv u because, your’re alive, you thrive, you strive…everyday…. to earn a new shape… never try to escape… you do … not try… you thrive.

if you weren’t alive… i would not know…or…be able to show… how much…. i adore you.

did you come here… just for me? or to share yourself and your beauty… for all to see… admire…. the way you grow… the way you glow… any one can see but not everyone …can know.

and so, with this …a kiss… not a trist… or a romp…. a galaxy worth of pomp… i will display for you… because you knew… just what to do… all u had to do…. was just be you.

Siri D

really? …. more fish in the sea???

Siri D — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 02:51:16 +0000

Thank you to any and all who take the time to comment…good bad or indifferent…. its your time and you can do anything you want with it….so i appreciate it

I have often heard the statement…. dont worry… there’s plenty fish in the sea …. well … as with anything else…this will evolve also… recently…. my friends were in Hawaii they took a glass bottom boat to go and look at all the sea creatures…. they have traveled there seasonally for years now….

my friends remarked when they returned home… where are all the fish? all the creatures…. yes there were a couple…but not like they used to be…. yes there is more ocean than land on Earth…so… maybe they have gone where the nets and the divers…and the oil spills are not… somewhere man cannot pollute… who knows…. but….. things…. are definitely changing…. and so is marine life… animal kingdom…. there are so many animals on the endangered list now, its incredible… i guess we have encroached…. and it is 2012 … so with 7 billion just under or over…. one would think there are plenty of fish in the sea…as far as dating…and mating will go …yes???

well…errr …. no.

if you are not particularly picky… and you dont mind and or maybe prefer serial dating….then …well yes…. variety will be your spice of life……..

but … if you have a more discriminating manner… and you truly want to find that “one” the more people we encounter… the harder it is to weed out and find the “one” and i know so many people are looking for that one… or that someone” in the very least …. good … honest company…. a friend….hopefully a faithful lover….

for most.. these are turbulent times…. with all the upheavals and changes going on……for some it is maddening… for others exhilarating…. but most of us prefer to not go it alone…. even if it means compromise…. and still…. while compromising …. they continue to search for the one…………..

now this will complicate things if one is found …while one is compromising….. its messy…. and usually the single one…. will not recognize … the compromising one as the one…. because why would the other one compromise…. if the single one will not…. the lines will be drawn simply by this alone.

at least this is how i feel…. i know it is said there are so many fish in the sea…. but, like the disappearing marine life…. so are unique match ups that we yearn to find and connect with….

so we hang out…. with people… and soon enough these people want to establish lines control… and thats when i see the exit sign…heheheheh……. sorry …but if your’re not the one…………….. im not the one.

and this should be respected because….. it keeps thing neat…. it can get messy…. when we know were will not ever get serious about someone… yet we still spend intimate time with them…. and always sooner…or later…..we plan our escape…. the whole time we were with that person… i know i am guilty of this…and i know many others…

so now, i just live with the faith…that …well maybe…. my fish will come swim by… and i will be just attentive enough to notice….

do we all know that song…”if you cant be, with the one you love, honey, love the one ur with” there might be a huge problem with that ..and the problem …is…………………. it is not love…..its just compromise…. cuz…well…. ur thinkin bout someone else constantly…and it seems that the more ur with the one ur with…. the more you want to be with the other….ahhhhh its a vicious cycle …

and now…. well Valentines day is rolling around ……… again….. does this… or does this not put undo pressure on the single????

yes…. it does….so here is my fix for the secret lover…. because “no one…loves nobody” and u know this man…..woman ,,,

and dont get me wrong……….. there are those lucky ones… who do have the one… oh yes my friends…….. it does exist… but these are the ones …who take the risk…. dove in….didnt look back….. or to the side…… went with their hearts over their heads…

because……. lets all face it……………….. Nothing and i do mean Nothing……………. is better than the drug….. we call…..L U V ….
LOVE … US…… VIBRANTLY

Openly….. unashamed….. just went for it… and it paid off……………big time….. the difference between a happy life… and a life in between happiness and misery……………. in other words … the roller coaster.

so…. here is for all the secret loves…. send a card…e card… leave a love letter….. for the one you love…. the very one…. no matter how scared you are…………….and sign ur name….. let em know its you…. because a secret admirer is soon forgotten…because we get bored trying to figure it out all the time

and maybe they love u too but in any case…. at least they will know you love them….. and in this world of virtual friendships…and likes and dislikes…. now more than ever do we need to feel something that is real…and not virtual….. at least i do

because that computer screen is not a real person…. and … it never will be….. no matter how long that screen saver stays on… it wont ever move….

or come near …………. or whisper that soft something in ur ear….
so this year….. my dear…..

i will tell you something that you always wanted to hear…. so come near…. here…. yes right here…..
where u been my dear? wasnt it April? no i will never forget….
and the more time passes…. the more i will sweat…. just to be near… or hear… ur voice… if love is my choice……..

than i choose you…. who? well…. cant tell say today…. but something tells me…………………. love is on the ……………way.

xoxo

Siri D

shhhhh…. remember… to live with ur secrets….

Siri D — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 21:17:03 +0000

Unless, we have an insane urge to purge constantly, most of us who reside on this planet…carry deep… personal secrets… and it is these secrets which control our daily lives, our nightly patterns.. our social interactions…. for some reason…. secrets… rule our lives…

Sometimes, when i am just waking… i like to take stalk of my secrets… in my case… they are deeply personal… a bit confusing… as to how i can feel the way i do about something, yet no one… not even my closest of friends in my circles know anything about them, you see, the topic is not taboo for them to speak of … the topic is taboo for me to speak of … and so it is never spoken… known…discussed…

oh sure… people try to guess at my thoughts… as to why i may do this or that… instead of this or that…. and i become most resistant towards those who would try to pry into my inner most thoughts… desires…. truths….. i truly believe, that unless i am willing to share this with someone. which would be rare indeed…. for humanity is not so secret savvy and or trustworthy when it comes to being the guardian of our most precious possessions…. secrets, memories, and heartfelt desires…. we hold them inside of us… like hidden treasure,

as we travel day to day through our own personal journeys…. i believe our daily lives are shaped by our secrets… for instance… we may judge new people who try to come into our lives by our secrets….some people call secrets closets…. but i prefer the word secret… for we are the guardians of our inner truths… not a closet where we can put them away and reach for them when we need them… no, in fact we hold these truths inside of us… no matter where we are or how we are …. wouldn’t it be nice to put down the burden of a secret in a closet, and just walk away from it, and take it out and play with it when we are strong enough… or able enough… no…’

a secret…. is always always a responsibility… and a burden i feel lucky, because, even though… i might have secrets… i am able to write, and express creatively what i might truly be feeling personally and therefore have some type of expression of the thing that lives in suppression…inside…. nothing hides…. we only think it is hidden..

for at every opportunity… . a nosy friend… or acquaintance will try to be an amateur head shrink in our life…. they will say … let me tell you whats wrong with you ” or… your problem is” or question your behavior in general…even though one is not doing anything illegal… or illicit…. one who might find pleasure in solitude, or the company of a pet over the company of a would be lover….

when people come into my life and try to be this would be head shrink (for those who see yourselves in these words) let me give my advice of the secret seeker….) there will never be anything as rewarding as seeking and finding ones own truths…. recognizing them, and living with them and or manifesting them in this world ….using them…. what ever we need to do to know our selves… to know our own personal truths, and really get real with who and what we are in this world…so that we may live more purposefully .

so … back to the amateur head shrinking friend… or better… acquaintance…

usually , or at least in my case…. if i am transitioning from one phase of my life… to a next… i will be focused on this intently… and for me … outside influence will only cloud my detailed vision… for their is none who can see as clearly as i do the vision and path God has put in my conscious…. it is my gift from god…. and i honor it… no matter how crazy… or weird … or strange…. or stupid it may seem to an outsider…. it is not theirs to judge.

when i am focused… i am still .. and usually keep socializing to a minimum…. for most of the time… when i am out socializing… i find my self not in the present of it… but wondering…. how can i excuse my self from this situation and go somewhere and write…or create… or walk … or jog…. in solitude… with my Bux…. and so, i am no good to a situation in most cases… i am not really there….

people will ask, why are you not dating? is that your husband? simply because i am standing next to a man…heheh…. ” I dont care if you are gay” “how old are you?” “where is your family from” “would you like to have dinner?” “can i call you” “lets go do this or that”

and of course…. it starts becoming the charlie brown syndrome. where the words are just mumbles … you know…when the adults speak in the charlie brown comics … wah wah wah wah wah …hehehe…. but i am being serious….

people get drowned out very quickly… my brain automatically does it when it senses communication that is on another wave length…it is almost a different language to me… now, dont think i am not grateful for invitations, and interest in my life… its just that …. most of the time…. the banter is mind numbing dribble…. for me any now… it is rooted in mundane thoughts and realities…. that are almost outdated within their own life… for the world is changing rapidly… and as i always say and said….

we can ignore it if we choose, but it does not mean it was not going to happen.

we all love to hear our selves talk, i am not innocent of this either…but… for the most part…. conversation…especially with new acquaintances… and or those that have unsuccessfully tried to break into our inner worlds …. the topics… are superficial at best… we may speak of politics…. but the deeper issue here is that no matter how emotionally engaged and or distracted we become with a process… the outcome at this point is fixed… and we see before a circus… and we get involved believing we can affect it…

for truly have we not all chosen a side? yes…. we have…. if we are adults of a certain age…we have most definitely chosen a side… and we may or may not voice this but, we have chosen…. so in effect…. it is done….

now maybe those who would vote republican…. still have not decided on their candidates…. but this is the limit to their choice…which one will they choose…. none, being any different from the other…. they are all politicians…. they move in the same pack… the only difference is who can sway their house, and congress to get done what their agenda is the quickest… its all politics… and politics were never meant to be for the people…. only to govern the country…. with its rules and regulations… enforce this…. and make a lil doe ray meeee… now, if this is your purpose in life….. then this is a great time to be alive!!!!

I guess it is all a great time to be alive…good or bad… its all experience….. it is through grace that we learn to roll with it… ride the wave…. but lets get back to the secrets… as usual… i have taken a side street into unending topic tangent called “politics”

the point was, even this is done in secret, our family might be republican…. and when we walk into the polling place to cast our vote … behind the little curtain…. we secretly vote democrat…. or independent…. or what ever… or vice versa….. feeling a tinge of guilt… maybe a little bit of stick it to the maniosis …heheh …. what ever we feel we have purged a secret….

for it is not just animals that run in packs…. oh no…. human is a pack animal as well…. the repubs the dems…. the fems, cops…. teachers…. actors, musicians, gays….straights…… girls … boys…… rich… poor….. intellectual…. jocks….. 9-5 ers…. 99 ers…. 1 per centers….. you name it…. we run in packs… and we decide in packs…. l and when one strays from the pack…

the pack will turn and burn the rebel….. this and only this …. is why we keep our secrets…. for Romeo…. loved Juliet…. but their packs were different….. and so it is … and so history repeats itself…. over and over and over….

until the devastating truth is revealed….. we are all not so different…. in fact, we are more the same then we are different … even in the plant and animal kingdom…. we all need water…. love….air ….. sun….. food…. and comfort to live….

we all protect our life… our children… our family friends…. from harm or harshness…. we are all deserving of kindness…loyalty…happiness… truth…..

and most of all …. all of us can be hurt, scared, shamed…. devastated…. all of us… plant …animal…. human…..

and animals have been known to keep secrets…. bugs keep secrets…. trees…. rocks…. we all keep secrets….

why am i writing about secrets….. well… if i told you…. would it be a secret????

maybe i am in love…. and one will never know… or see…. or experience my deepest desire….. it does not mean … i would go out and live a life of compromise… and entangle with someone i am not in love with….

in some ways…. i am a purist…. and i see too many unhappy people in relationships they got into out of fear of loneliness….and peer pressure to do the right thing…..

this has never been my issue…. i dont care what other people think of my status as far as being single …. or married… or co habitating… or hanging out with…. this has always been my gift…. i do what i like…… its my life… and opinions…. well we all know what they say about opinions….. everyone has them…. heheheh…….

the buddah would not have been the buddah had he caved into peer pressure to be a king… husband… a father…. there is great sacrifice in following the compass of our heart…. and rest assured… it wont come without criticism and mostly from those that would be closest in our lives…. for some reason they feel they have an entitlement to tell you and shape your path…. but this is not true….

we are all born of God, and we are only Gods children …. with guardians… in our earliest part of life…. and these are only guardians…. not people to cling to our whole lives… as most people do….

you know, the fourty year old who has to get his mothers permission still…. that is so sad….. or the fifty year old or thirty year old…..at what point are we emancipated from the opinions of others?

at what point do we become fully functioning adults making some type of contribution to the greater world… not just our own inner circle…..

i was listening to a woman on the radio … speak of her father…. and that she was angry with him… and she started crying… and he was well into his 90′s … and she was in her 60′s, and she was sobbing and carrying on as if she was a teenager…and the emotional relationship between them had not matured…. i listened with compassion… but i could not help but to think…. this condition has stunted and shaped her whole life…. that she could never have become what her secrets are…because her actions are so closely guided by what her father thinks… not her own inner truth….. and i thought…. how sad…

and somehow…. i felt that she thought …everyone is like this…. and or should be like this…. we should all hold onto our parents and not grow up and become functioning… thinking …. independent adults…. i dont know… i thought …. this is really scary…. imagine if she was married…. how her husband would feel,, her children…. and we learn to keep our secrets….

some times a secret will be right in your face…. by the way we might live in solitude…. in quiet happiness…. flowing from phase to phase… or simply diggin in like a fox in a hole….. only coming up for air when we really have to…..

in this world…. thats not such a bad idea…. to keep our secrets…. hold them sacred …

in a world where we constantly feel the need to post our status… which by the way is never really the status… it is what we want you to believe about us in that moment…. but still …. do i really need you to know my status??? no i dont….

this is my status…. my privacy….. and in fact… as i am not a face book member… and the more intrusive it becomes…. the more i dont like it…..

did you know, government officers use face book twitter…and all other social media to monitor your behavior??? so it can be determined whether you are friendly to the state…. or an enemy???? yes it is getting this way… more and more ….

if you dont believe it …. just read the news…. a couple of British people were deported as soon as they got to america for tweeting…they were going to party and mess a couple things up here in america…. they were in their early 20′s and i hardly think they meant it….

but this is not the issue… the issue is…they and we are being monitored … our every word…. even these words i write right now….

so our secrets have become and even more precious commodity given the state of the facebook generation…. exposing their every thought …good bad or indifferent…. in some desperate attempt … i guess to feel important????

admired… loved….. approved of … “liked”???? for myself…. i prefer to stay sovereign…. keep my options open…. and my thoughts and personal feelings…somewhat private…. not that i have illicit thoughts…. no not at all… its just that they are my private property … in a world where nothing is private… everyone exposes every moment…. more than i want to know …its called TMI … too much mundane information….

To go inside…. feel who we are… and be comfortable with this…. carefully express and share the goodness and those things which we can share with humanity…and make a difference….. such as secrets to happiness…. to peace…… eating certain things cause certain things… things like this …things we can share…. and offer as gifts to our fellow humans….

i prefer this …to sharing how many times a day one can change their underwear…. it is probably why … i dont do social networking….

i guess…. i am not that social…heheheh…… and i prefer my privacy… not to mention…. i dont feel like giving facebook my personal content …which by the way is the reason people go there…. and they in turn own it…. monetize off of it…. and make billions out of your personal life… and you give it away freely……

no…. if i am going to expose my ass… or you expose your ass…. wouldnt you like to be the one making the billions???? since it is your life that is whats is intersting….it is your content people are enjoying…. and …face book puts ads on your personal page…peddling everything from insurance to religion…depending on the highest paying client… and they take all the money and never give you a dime…. hmmmmm

do you like that???? no??? how about the fact that you are being monitored… your every word…. heartbreak…drunken episode … like that??? even employers are now checking out your page to check your character… weird …. huh????

no, i think… once again… i am going to cut myself from the pack here…. and go my own way…. like a lone wolf…. and howl right here… on siridyal.com

the moon…she listens to me…. she is my grand mother…. my greatest friend…. our beautiful satellite … remember her…. the moon… the stars… the constellations… the very way we found ourselves here in America…. guided by the stars…. remember the trees, the water falls…. the flower the wild flower???? oh yes…. this is my pack… we hang everyday…..

my secrets??? ah yes…. my secrets…. they are with me eveyday….. perhaps you will find my secrets in the lines between in my lyrics… my blogs…. my actions…. but secrets are not meant to be everyday banter or chatter….. at least not mine….

big brother will simply have to make due with my blogs … my songs…. and anything else i might make public… for my private life is my treasure… and one without measure… its the only true property we can still own…. and protect…. without copyright infringement…

because we have chose to keep the secret…. now is the time for for me to keep my secrets… perhaps a little bit down the road…. i may expose them…. but for now…. i will keep them… protect them…. and build my world and unveil it…when it is fully formed….

what is your secret.??? perhaps your secret is reading this blog….. it doesnt matter…. i will never tell … nor do i even know if you do.. unless you make a comments or register with my blog…..

i love my secret readers… i love you all….. keep your secrets … protect your truth… your purpose…. pursue it with every breath and ounce of life you have in your physical body….

build your world from the inside out…. not the outside in….. manifest…. and bear fruit….
its why you are here…

dont be afraid of who you are… and mostly dont be afraid to fail… for their is no success without failure… know this…. understand this….

and build your life…. keeping in mind… the greater world we live in today…and all action will create a reaction in this world…. be conscious of your consumption… what u put into ur self…. and what you put out….

lets try not to be habitual ritual beings… meaning do everything our parents did or do…. this is not the world they grew up in…and the rules are significantly different now….

have 2 or 3 kids…. is not a good idea anymore…. not unless were talking about eugenics… and most are not.

build your life, and your kingdom before your start a family….. it is expensive to have children… remember this, they need all your love and attention… so if you have them… prepare to sacrifice your own personal dreams…. until they are grown….

love yourself…. just love yourself….bless yourself…. do nice things for others…. strangers… and feel how good it feels to do this….

the word is changed… and still in the months to come… even more… and their will be more chaos… and huge change to our planet… be still and watch the destruction with quiet detachment…. know…that a new and better day is coming…

and that we will all be happy and live purposefully once again…. just a few more huge bumps in the road to ride….

until then …. just be there… dont judge…. or point a finger…. remember… we are all in this together…

and in your solitude…. remember your secrets….. they are your legacy… your treasure of true humanity

xoxo

Siri Dyal

surrender to the obvious.

Siri D — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 10:26:05 +0000

….. she received the cryptic messages…every
one… in fact… she had noticed them with great attention for years…. but … somewhere along the third and fourth year… she realized… this is repetitive…. dull… not sharp … or even witty… and now bordering on annoying… she read them any way … perhaps … out of habit.

she did not know or remember him anymore… his touch… the way his warm soft skin felt against hers… the tenderness in his touch… no… this was but an intellectual memory… the sense of it…. was long gone…. and she thought… “good” for there is nothing lasting in things that dont last… there is no point in trying to recapture a moment in the past….” and she hoped… in his efforts to keep himself in her mind…..would subside in the rough cold skin of another.

in her confidence she knew… there is no skin like my skin…. and there is no sin…like my sin… with a mirthful eye she watched all his castles crash horribly to the ground… only for him to scramble in the sand…. and it delighted her… for as he was building he would always throw rocks… big…. hard…. sharp rocks…. not only this…but he would spend precious resource to have those who would be hired for such duty… to help him propel these rather large sharp objects….

“funny” she thought…. doesn’t he know….” the bigger the rock…. the easier to see and therefore dodge….silly rabbit…or rat…. trix are for kids….

and this is a grown folks playing field… thought you knew lil sprout…. obviously… only kids can give you the clout that you are looking for ….

they laughed and laughed…but they aint laughin no more.

oh … oops…. i am sorry …. i was out in the real world…forgot to check my trash bin… for the latest waste of your time……………

sublime, senses, warmth of his touch … real … of course… never play games with such.

jack and jill did go up that hill… they fetched that pail of water…

jack fell down…. lost his crown… and jill…went on to splendor.

we changed the story … for contemporary times…. the past is gone…but we still like to rhyme…. now..i wonder…. is that rare orange asunder…. or just under…. or over… par.

take ur brain out that jar… the one…that told you … u are so far … ahead above all the rest… that was a test… and u failed…miserably…. terribly… shameful…yes…
but…dont cop a plea…. when there is no offering

live with it… deal with it…l been around… not much when it comes to love…except… the real thing… all the rest… nothing more than a fling.

bling bling bling…. just do yo thing… life is but a dream… or a nightmare…depending on where …. or what side of the playing field ur on…

u on the field of dreams…. where the heart pulls the strings….

or u in ur head…. news flash… the head is dead….. so sorry fred.

lifetimes i can play…wait…. if it aint right… then no need to escape… just close the gate… its way toooo late…. to apologize.

means nothing…especially in virtual reality…. means nothing to me…. get it out of my head… writing this blog will do… tomorrow…. touch something real… for sure… you have to know my deal…. stopped believing…. a long time ago.

not gonna say ur a joke…. just a lil green .. when it comes to handlin the scene… the truth …. the most precious gift…

took it to ur head… one more time… the head is dead.

now… its a joke… between u and me… a moat…. even if you had a forty foot rope…. you couldnt reach me…. teach me…. i am already schooled… any thing for you… is a feast for fools…. and i am not hungry for a mutha fuckin tool. yeah thats what i think of you

the princess of great mercy and compassion… yes… its my fashion… but i gots ta keep it real…. and i always go for what i feel…

so…that being said… when is the last time ur letters been read…. seen the tracks of my tread… years i think… and you still skate the rink…same circle …same game… so tired… so lame….

straighten ur frame… stand up for something other than a game… a joke … man… you even make me not wanna smoke….. and thats not a lie…. your my anti high….

so why come nigh????

only a fool … would come around for you…. especially when u do what u do… who…. who…has any self esteem…would climb into your maniacal dream.????

he say’s he stay positive… make me laugh… well that is positive…

oh so its just the minion who do the neg… who beg… who betray … grow up brotha… learn anotha way…

cryptic bullshit….i am not buying…or even trying to understand… waste ur time… its ur time to squander…wander… in the desert for years…

already shed enough tears… cry a lake, a river, never will i shiver…

i feel good…and strong… gave all the day long… truth…love…. a lil insanity… and as they say…. in love… there is always license for this…. and it was bliss to feel the way i felt ..

dove in so deep… so deep said yes when he knelt….. oh shit… that was my dream…never mind…. the reality…was so unkind… no need to rewind…

i dont want it anymore.

so happy i am beyond that shore…. all i see is the ocean floor… and its deep so deep
want to dive in…. and i am not too weak….

this week is the week … the peak of the bleak… and undone…unsung… the bell will never be rung…. stop waiting….

find your rare citrus and get to betraying… its what you do and we all are a cog… your cog is to flog… and kick down the dog…

dont be ashamed that your heart is in pain… recognize ur size in the purest of eyes…. you are a child… mild … and tempered…. frail and fettered…

cant help but to love u like a babe…. in the heat of the sun…give u some shade

in the cold of the winter hold you tight…. mama…says its gonna be allllll right….

but dont try to be my man… ur a babe in my hand…. i will do what i can… to help you grow … let u know… its okay to give love… just for the sake of love….

no more hurt…no more pain…. love who you are … and dont refrain… to express yourself… without fear of rejection…. for like the babe in my arms…

you get a mothers affection… my kisses… confection….

but only like a mother to a babe….. when u grow up …. you will know…

how to love… and how to show….. but for now….. just relax and enjoy

a mothers love…. and a brand new ……………………….toy.

oh boy.

xoxo

Siri Dyal

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!! DRAGON YEAR!!! GET READY FOR THE FIREWORKS BABIES ;)

Siri D — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 20:54:57 +0000

Now, normally i try to stay neutral when it comes to politics, because it is rude to speak of such topics as politics … religion…. things of this nature where we make choices in our lives, and ultimately these choices must be respected by everyone…even if they do not agree….. but today, i received an email, and it was so heinous in nature … that it boiled my blood…. insensitive… rude…. and down right despicable…

the message was hidden in a popular childhood fable about the Ant, and the Grasshopper…. we all know the story…. “oh the world owes me a livin” sings the grasshopper, as he watches the ants toil through the summer heat, the grasshopper sings, and ignores the hard working ant…. come winter…. the grasshopper is cold….. without food and shelter…. while the ant who worked all summer long… is down in their warm cave with food and water, and all the comforts to last the winter long now….

i loved that story when i was a kid, and i loved the record, i would play it over and over…because the book came with the record……

now, the email i received today twisted the story… into the grasshopper being a democrat… and the ants being republicans….. and instead of the grasshopper dying he held a press conference… to ask why the ants had everything … and he has nothing and they should share…. the lawyers became involved… Oprah Winfrey, Barack Obama blamed , all the past republicans… and evicted the poor hard working ants and let the grasshopper occupy the place where he subsequently died of a drug overdose…..

now, this may not offend you, but let me be clear here, i am not a Democrat, I am an Independent, this being said…. first lets look at the obvious evils in this campaign using children stories to disseminate hate…. this is a no no…. i am sure we can all agree there are many with child like intellects who are adults and are not able to decipher the difference between a story and actual truth… obviously this was designed to trick the not so strong minded into thinking they were getting the raw end of the deal by asking for what they deserve.

Now, in last nights blog, i let you know, i am not part of the occupy movement, this is not my function here on Earth, my cog is of a different nature, and at the same time i respect the peoples ability to rally … to speak out….. say no more” i love this about the American process…. i get it…. first of all most of the occupiers are working class people, some employed some not…and there are always fringes …. however… the majority is the working class…

now, let us understand what happened here, as so many just do not understand the plight…. wage increase according to profit increase stopped sometime in the early 70′s, and has not resumed since..this is factual, and actual. Credit also started around the same time to extend to the working class so they could join in and have a slice of the good life… a home… a job…. medical care…so on and so forth….

but …. as the cost of living rose…. the profit margins rose, because more and more Americans had to work more hours to cover the cost of living … to pay for their homes with exaggerated interest rates… and god forbid, we get sick…for then…we will lose it all… and the profit margins rose for the corporations and the top one percent of those holding those positions.. in essence… someone sitting in a desk on top of all the labor…. doing little to nothing… more than likely … a nepotistic relationship, or Alum …. to keep the money in the family. They Collect millions, while the laborers, or energy pushers…. live and subsist on what is now peanuts by today’s standard of living. This is what the 99 per centers are fighting against…. this is their plea……

and it started happening in the 70′s this is where the greed curve grew exponentially. I guess the straw to the camels back is when a average middle class family who hold down 2 jobs a piece to support their families….lose their homes and their life savings over pennies really…. just pennies…. this has collapsed the American economy…. and what this is … is GREED.

I bet you already knew, that when a bank forecloses oh someones home, the federal government gives the bank the full value of the home …. FDIC INSURED…… so… not only does the bank get all the money that was put into the property…. when they kick you out of your home… the federal government pays the whole cost of the foreclosed property to the bank, sounds like a good reason for the bank to robo sign…and get the foreclosure going… huh???? who loses???? only the hard working man or woman…. and it was only a matter of time before the fuse hit the anger bomb…

Now i am not saying all rich people are non compassionate, and i am not saying all victims of this current state of events are hard workers… no… i am not….

i am simply saying… the balance does not exist …. with taxes…. interest rates, the more money you have, the cheaper everyday life is for you…. i am not sure this is the right way to have a healthy society, and perhaps….. no one really cares, save for those who are innocent hard working victims…. and there are many….

Our band wrote “Need 2 Feed ” in 2004….. to our observation it was at its apex then, but it took time for it to trickle to the masses for them to wake up and make a call to action…. but i dont know if the call is accurate, organized, or even possible to effect change….. the system is deeply corrupted all the way to the top….. yes….. all the way to the top… society now, is politics…. pure and simple….

if your a member of congress or even a congressional aid, it is legal to inside trade…. so you see….the system is not set up for fair labor and trade practices… it is set up to be elitist, and make room for collateral damage…. and as Bill Gates says…. lower the population by 15% this is what the elite want.

well fortunately, they will get what they want, but not how they wanted it, and it will be indiscriminate to wealth, age, beauty, gender, religion, culture, it will come and level the playing field…

most do not believe, but help is on the way.

You dont think they are going to get away with all of this behavior and sail into the sunset do you???? never fear my loves, never fear….. for the great cleansing is upon us…. ready your selves with optimism, hope, confidence….. joy, laughter…. this will really throw them off…. they will say ” hey…. why are those people smiling… laughing…. loving” ” they should be miserable…. they have no money…no home…. those lazy drug addicts … let em suffer and die”

well, you just smile, cuz you know something they dont…. because their arrogance will be their last supper to sup upon……. for most of the wealthy have forgotten some very strong truths….
without the labor, their production will not get done… from assembly to shipment…. we are all one…. and everyone deserves a fair wage for their contribution to that organizations prosperity… pure and simple…

Let us remember how this great nation became so great and wealthy…. off of the free labor of slaves, and immigrant workers …. while the “massa” sat in the house away from the sweltering heat… and blistering cold…. slaves toiled the land….bringing us the first cash crop of America which made us wealthy….what was that crop???? TOBACCO.

Since this time, wealth has been handed down generation to generation, with some breaking through, to achieve the American dream, but most, labor, not slave labor, we just send those jobs out to third world countries now

There was a time in this country when the dream was still the dream and achieving it was within reach, but now, with the wealth totem the way it is in place…. it will be damn near impossible… this is because the totem needs to be in place for the greatest of wealth to be this way, it can not be spread around in a balanced healthy way if the super wealthy want to stay super wealthy… so there must be some form of slavery and oppression for the current state of our affairs to stay this way. or just call it…. the “status Quo”

Have you ever read the book…. “behold a pale horse” if not…. try to find a copy…. and read it… this was all organized and executed long ago… with the “bankers” being on the top of the totem…

funny how they used to be little institutions that held our hard earned money… well…. now…. they control it and how they do!!!

whether we like it or not…. and now, a lot do not!!! hehehe …. well we have to look at the status quo with some type of mirth…dont you think? for it will not last….

things change…just like that Kundun”

In truth….it is all illusion… power….wealth… poverty…health…sickness…. its all an illusion….and we are here to learn this…and ultimately to break free from the cycle of death and rebirth… over and over again we make the same mistakes, take the wrong paths, make terrible life changing decisions, over and over, and then there comes those times…when the right path is fought for against all odds..and it is achieved….. history is made, and world changes….. this … and this alone should teach us of our greatness and what we can achieve when we dare to execute our dreams…. not just dream…but actually put cause to action…

No one said it would be easy…. and why should it be??? we want to feel how hard we had to work to achieve…yes??!!! yes!!! so we feel deserving of our victories… cherish and nurture them ..because we remember how hard we fought for them.

The world will change whether we effect it or not…. it is just time … and we can be an active part of it…. or we can put our heads in the sand… and swallow another year of political war… and demoralizing by those that seek to divide…. for to conquer… one must divide…. we are great in numbers…. weak alone….

so let us unite…. not in a negative posture..but rather a positive posture…first to understand our greatness and how much our contribution does mean to this world…. it means so very much… we contribute to everything in this world…and every uber wealthy individual is not there by their own deeds rather by our support and nourishment to their establishments.. we consume, produce, and promote for them….. for free… hehehe… isnt that funny…. do you really need 100 pair of tennis shoes, boots, purses, jackets, ??? no, but someone needs you to buy them so they can be wealthy… and you can appear to be wealthy so you can be accepted so you can eventually have sex…heheh…sorry but it does boil down like that in its most distilled truth.

do you need ten cars??? 5 houses??? 300 pair of jeans??? rethink what you are saying…. when we live this way,, as needless consumption….. everyone wants to be rich…look rich …act rich…. look down… on those who are not rich…. but in their hearts…. when they look in the mirror…. they know its a fraud…. a sham…. a farce…… because the truth of our oneness…. is absolute.

many know i am not a christian, i am a seeker of truths in all forms…so i do not subscribe to any one religion … there are great lessons from all of them, and i live by and pick and choose from the best of each….

in these American election times… i find it so amusing that politics always leans on religion…. i am a christian, he is a mormon, he is a jew, he is a muslim…..and this will come mostly from the republican or conservative sect…. and i have yet to find a non wealthy republican politician….. and so i remember this bible verse…. it always was so powerful to me as a child and perhaps it truly shaped my mind in this world…. and it reads, ” It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a wealthy man to enter the kingdom of Heaven” hmmmmmmm …..

now like i said, i am not the one going around saying i am a christian, but i do love some of the truths of the word…. but if i was a christian, republlican politician…. i would be awfully worried about my ticket to heaven …heheheh …………………… just saying

something to ponder…

have a beautiful day, and a wonderful wonderful Happy Chinese New Year

I love you all…..even you wealthy ones hehehe

xoxo

Siri Dyal

in the quiet desperation….unplug… and plug into the source of love…

Siri D — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 09:23:53 +0000

do you plug into something, someone, to feel less desperate..those moments when its just you…and your thoughts… your actions, the sum of your past… adding up to your present? what do you plug into when you are in a quiet desperation….

Siri? you say…. what is a quiet desperation… isnt it loud… crazy… cracked and broken? what is desperation????

well… my friend…. desperation is the state of the planet Earth…right here…………right now.

and since we are all connected to the Atma…you know it… no matter how you’re fixed financially, single…. married…. serial co habitator on your hundredth and fiftieth live in love that you promise to marry…but, know… u never will

no matter where your at… the sense of nothingness…. and mediocrity … and pointless ness is ever consuming our thoughts .. our dreams… our hearts…. our actions…. in effect…

in short… in long….. we are numb… and the taste is dull….

even when we achieve a level of success we have been working for long and hard…. when we get there….some are happy for us… and some wish we could not achieve what we finally achieved….

by now, we have all seen how vain and pointless fame, and fortune are… it brings no more happiness to us…. and if there is any truth in the up coming cataclysms…. not even money can save us….

we will be re inventing our humanity…. and i for one…. do not think this is such a bad thing..

so i think , and of course .. this is just my opinion…. unplugging from the superficial aspects of life… and just send one plug…. into the source… and all of your everything will be fulfilled… how do we do it???

start with the little things…. facebook, what is that? do you really care that someone just had a spaghetti dinner and is turning in? well if your a stalker… then probably yes… heheh… but for most of us… the addiction is just that addiction… meaningless… and we waste our precious time and attention on things that mean nothing…

these are not our real friends… we are not fortified spiritually by these connections… only superficially gratified that we might have so many people who want to sell their ideas to us… or… ask us to be their fans… and like them…. why oh why do we seek such approval…. without approving our own selves our own lives…. is it out of duty…. out of impulse… lack of self esteem? what is it in us… that cannot journey our own magnificent lives … be so interested in who we are ..and interested in bringing out the best of who we are…

we keep on looking outside…. in so many things…. money…. status…. sex…. food….. drugs…. what is it????

here is a quick quiz to see if you live your life from your own center… or if you live your life…. by what others expect of you…

when you go out… is it because your want to? or your friends expect you to?

is your girlfriend or boyfriend someone your friends and family all like ? perhaps your sister or brother chose them for you… they’re cool…but you know you will never fall in love…

are you afraid to step out for what is right? in your own life… that is …what ever your personal right is …. are you afraid to live your life in truth…light…. be open…. and honest and have what you want in your life… and what you dont want…. leave it behind…

or do you continue to live under the same roof with something that defines you as living a lie. work at a job that gives no nourishment to your soul… only gives a pay check…and usually one… that isnt making you happy…….

well if you answered yes to any of those questions…. you need to unplug… and plug into your righteousness… your truth… your simplicity… personally i dont need a million friends …. one true ..good one will do…

yes..i love to love and give love to many… but a tried and true friendship is rare indeed…. and i suspect… i wont find one on face book

isnt it nice to just sit underneath the stars with someone… or in front of a fireplace…. and just have a great old fashioned face to face conversation…and look into their eyes…and feel their excitement… and share and pontificate… and then go home and have a great nights sleep…. because you just had a great time with a good friend… and they will be there for you… no matter what …and you know this…. most of all you trust this.

and you sleep well..and life has purpose… because you have purpose…you make someone happy …and you share yourself… unselfishly…. not to get something in return… youre there … just to give…. just to serve… …. the time will come when they have the same chance to serve you…. it always comes around ….

we plug into things on the outside of us… to fulfill our needs…. imagine urself unplugging urself pulling the plug on all exterior…except for the one truth in our lives…. our creativity… our God center…. our truth… what ever that truth is………..without judgement … for everything is valuable in this world…..

it either teaches us…. or we teach it…. it is an inescapable cycle…
even beyond this world…. we evolve and evolve and evolve…

we seek….the unknowable… something we can never quite know… however…we can achieve glimpses..but we can never know the unknowable…. for then it would be known….

and the truth is … as long as you have breath in your body… you are plugged in to this great unknowable source…the source of all .. the source of love….

but we have so many other plugs…. so many meaningless plugs…. useless… out of habit plugs…. its not easy… i know…

but the path of truth in this world of convulsion will not be an easy one… for it is set up to ensnare and entrap as many as it can… to hold their souls in eternal darkness and confusion..

your soul, your light, your beingness, the whole of who you really are … is so precious ….. so valuable….. so priceless…. and even as i write it… i am sure … u dont believe it, because you have been conditioned to think you are nothing but a battery….

work… pay your bills, eat convenient, corporate food, take meds, pay your taxes…. die… and let your family pay the rest…

do not think… do not question….

i love the occupy movement…. and i am waiting for them to have organization in their there movement… in their process… for it to make sense in the way things need to be to make progress… not just temporary chaos… and rattling….

for when cause and effect have no definable connection it is chaos.

and unorganized chaos… will eventually fizzle into a memory… nothing more…

for real change… we must make real stands…. not reactionary displays of rebellion…

there is no end to what the people could do if we organized for real… and not in an angry posture… for we can not blame the world for where it is…. we participated in the making of this world we can not subtract ourselves and place blame on those who would take opportunity on our kindness… our generosity…

truly… they suffer, and will suffer, but the point is… they are still a part of us… we are still one… to look upon others as separate from ourselves…. is delusion…if we cannot see god in all… we cannot see god ………..at all…and this is where we must start…and stop….

unplug…. and leave one plug … only to the source…. that we might… be servants to those that need us… examples for those that are just coming up in this world….

that we be the change we wish to see…. not an angry mob…screaming for change… this will never do…. never…

Martin Luther King protested peacefully… and effected great change…. we must learn from our greatest leaders…..

we are all in the quiet desperation… we bite our nails, whether literal or metaphorical … keeping us in the past in the future… but never in the present… the gift of now…

unplug…. realize… you are everything… now… whole …. not separate from the source… infinite in true nature…

the comings and goings of society will never change who we are …. only that we allow ourselves to become emotionally attached to the ups and downs… the bitter and the sweet…

but we can unplug…. we can realize… ascend…. graduate…elevate…. live in joy… and peace….
knowing… its all a part of a bigger picture… that we dont have to become so personally involved in the drama…

back away…. detach….. allow your qualities of peace… and bliss… and joy to rise to the surface of your being….. revel in this…. marvel in this…. and from here it will grow…

and know…. it goes on and on and on…

for this is why we were in such a hurry… yes???

someone told us… we only had this amount of time to do this and that achieve this and that… make our mark… be a king… a queen… and then die….

well i have news for you…. you have infinity to invent yourself… here or in other worlds…. what and who your are goes on and on and on…. you evolve endlessly…

enjoy your life…. be in the moment… and only the moment make it relevant…. let nothing else come into it… that is not uplifting your mind… your heart…. your soul…

be the guardian of your life… if something isnt right in your life… subtract yourself from the influence and or the entanglement… set yourself free…for you are the only one who can

see others as yourself… really discipline yourself in all your thoughts…
and soon…. the quiet desperation will be a forgotten you… not even a thought…

for you are here to flourish…bloom… and be…. everything opulent and divine that you were born as ….. not to be….

for……………….you already R.

i love u so

xoxo

Siri Dyal